I'm sitting here this morning listening to the rain, coffee in hand. The house is quiet; Tim's gone for the day and both the dog and Samuel are sleeping. Just a few minutes of perfect solitude before I start the chaos of my day. I keep glancing at the baby monitor, and even through the video feed I can't stop staring at my baby's perfect, peaceful face. When Tim left this morning I stood in the kitchen for a good 5 minutes, staring at the dishes and feeling the "Martha" compulsion to get my kitchen sparkling again. But then I remembered that Jesus was waiting for me in my living room, next to the Bible that I haven't had time (or so I tell myself) to open in a few days. So I decided to choose to have a "Mary" heart this morning and sit at the feet of Jesus. As my mother would say about housework, "It will keep."
I read this verse again this morning, especially after getting Sam dedicated at church last night. We had prayed so fervently for a child for years and had celebrated with all of our friends year after year as their kids were dedicated. So last night to have our names called to come to the stage to dedicate Sam is a moment I will never forget. We are humbled and blessed that we get to experience being parents. Little did we know when we announced our pregnancy with this picture that we would end up naming our son Samuel. God sure has a sense of humor! Our prayers have been answered in so many ways
We had our two month wellness appointment...well...one month ago. Finding the time to blog as a new mother has been a bit challenging to say the least! Anyway, one of our biggest concerns along with the potential for his ventricles to get larger was Sam hitting his first milestones: smiling and tracking. As we've done all along, we've had to trust that the Lord had Sam in his hands and that He was going to bring about the best outcome. By the day of his appointment, he had been smiling at us. And not just the "I'm pooping" smiles but genuine, wide-open mouth smiles. We were (and are) ecstatic.
This whole experience with Samuel has stretched me further than I ever thought I could be stretched. It has tested my faith in ways that have forced me to gain strength and grow and as I take this journey through motherhood I'm glaringly aware of my insufficiencies. And every day I say to myself "when I am weak, then He is strong." He's the one who's gotten both Tim and I through this. I am in awe of the faithfulness and love that God IS. He hears our prayers, heals our diseases, and faithfully brings us through trials that ultimately are meant for our greater good.
Thank you all again for your prayers, support and love.
Shanna, Tim & Baby Samuel




